All them "Dick Books" were full of these strange people living in these fantasy lands where everybody had everything, and kids didn't get whipped with extension cords.
The kids in them books looked so weird too.
Not like anyone we'd ever seen. Yeah they was all white, but not normal white. They were all dressed so neat didn't have fucked up teeth not fat or insane looking or dorky or ugly like real kids looked. Their parents were just downright from other planets.
All rich driving two cars at once wearing fuck'n suits evening gowns having the boss over for dinner. The boss looked like that editor Mr. White from that old "Superman" series on black'n white TV.
The frigging ice cream man,...the big event of the day in these things.
That guy looked like "Clark fucking Kent". He'd let these Zombie kids crawl all over his truck, and would usually give these mutants all the free cones they could carry. He didn't even molest them. The grandparents were stranger still.
For one they weren't living in a refrigerator box in a vacant lot.
They wasn't nuts, and crapping, and drooling all over the place either. They had these big bleeping estates in the country in which they let these cyborg kiddies run about in making all the destructive mayhem they wanted.
Did I mention the damned dog.
That little fuck ate better than anyone on my block, and got to crap, and piss wherever it wanted. I remember always hoping the damned thing would get run over by a big garbage truck.
Squashed to hell it's guts flying out of it's mouth it's fucking brains splattering Dick, and Jane. The parents sprayed with shit blood, and assorted puppy parts as the truck obliviously drove on.
Finally these proto-One Percenters see some reality!
Btw all this is was just the books...TV, and movies is a whole 'nother chapter.
("Dick, and Jane" deleted scenes. This image below from "Dick, and the Magic Powder." The stupid kid takes too much of his Beatnik Uncle's cocaine., and has a seizure.)
I was going to put an image of our pal "Dick" up there getting a blow job from "Rastus" their grandparents Colored handy man...handy indeed. You'll just have to imagine that blessed event as I don't want to get this joint deleted,...again.
Btw,...here's a further "Deleted Scene".
I was going to leave this out figuring I had done justice to this deranged sem-reality. However a good comrade pointed out the necessity of including it.
Yep besides being a kid from some alternate universe Dick's also a gleeful Sissy. The only thing 'good' about his whole weird family. Like 'me' in my early daze his grandma liked to dress the little faerie up in gowns, and what not.
Looks like there's 'hope' for the little prick yet!
(A re-write of an old post that I like.)
Stay Tuned.
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