Friday, July 31, 2015

"My New Hobby"

Everybody should have some sort of hobby. I mean that is if you ain't living in a cardboard box, and eating tree bark like I used to do. For a while now my hobbies have been  doll collecting, and big greasy lunch times. Though I'm thinking of being an alcoholic.

An ancient, and honorable way to destroy not only your life, but those of pretty much everyone around you.

Yep I'll be throwing empty beer bottles against the wall like any real boozer would. 'Not eat not shave not shower not take out the growing mountain of trash for weeks or months.

As by tradition spend all the pittance of my retirement dough on booze uppers downers, and ammo for my snub-nose-38. Which I'll be saving for anyone that gets between me my whiskey crack, and cheddar Pringles. Yep ' this' "hobby" should take up all my time. 

At last a purpose in life again!

Speaking of "Hobbies". I remember my Mom taking me to the toy store, and getting this for me for my 9th traumatic birthday. (This actual very kit!) For some reason I always remembered that trip, and this kit. She helped me build it too.

I recall she said as to how she helped my Uncle Owen her big brother build his model kits. They we all made of balsa wood back in that day. I loved my Mom. She protected me from the bullies, and assorted evil cousins as best she could.

Anyway this just came to mind as I was contemplating a new life of booze, and deflated kidneys. Naw on second thought fuck Booze. The "exit wound" seriously sucks.

Stay tuned.


  1. I know a man who's drinking himself to death. It isn't pretty. When sober, he's kind, considerate, thoughtful and sensitive. When drunk, he's the diametric opposite of all those things: irrational, childishly selfish, and frighteningly prone to rage. Ever read "The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde," or seen the movie? It's like that.

    The problem is, he's more often drunk than sober these days. I tend to keep my distance now.

    Cool model. Lucky your mom knew how to build one. I once got a model sailing ship, but didn't have the skill to put it together. Almost became a little glue sniffer too.

    I just remembered, I had two model ships. One was The Sovereign of the Seas, an old English three-masted war ship. The other was Drake's flag ship, the Golden Hinde. Long after, I once went on board a replica of the second ship. The design was pleasing to look at, but it was quite small, and the decks below were cramped, not high enough to stand up in.


  2. I had an older cousin with this awful disease. Same here he was thoughtful gentle all that when he was himself, but on the sauce he was frankly evil. I never understood how alcohol could do such to sane people, and why would they want it?

    Those ships were made for folks a foot to a foot, and a half shorter, and less wide that us guys here in the future. It'd be like us trying to move into a Hobbit house.

    Never liked the glue it gave me a headache. Same with Heroin. Could never get past the "Vomit Barrier" that all newbies encounter. Lucky for me.

    I am very sorry for your friend. That stuff destroys good souls. I was sort of kidding about wanting to join that sorrowful crew. Maybe I'll just go back to my pastry addiction. Sure it'll kill me, but it'll take longer, and it tastes a lot better.