Quite today...resting. Still very weak still dizzy, but no pain with it now. My sleep cycles are coming back. What a blessing sleep, and dreams are.
Listening to the sound of my heart as it thumps. Your ear deep in a pillow seems to amplify the beat...your life's rhythm.
One of the most positive even magical things living beings do.
"Parsifal" Wagner's greatest hit...or one of them beats daytime TV. Listening on headphones. This piece lends itself to contemplation...some of it anyway.
"Oh life you are so strange so wonderful, and so brief."
I want that on whatever urn they dump my fried ashes in...yes I wrote it. I'm good at cooking up prayers. Maybe they'll let me write hymnals in paradise or at least do comic books.
We are the sum of our stories. The sum of all we have done real or imagined.
I'm thinking as so many have implored me to do. I'm getting set to at last put together a volume of my ravings. This latest round of illness has drop kicked me into another phase of my life...I think. Big things do that. Like most layabout or deranged creative types all my energy goes into the dreaming, and making. None...none whatever to spreading the stuff around.
"...And so Gawd created Agents."
Our species seems uniquely gifted at pattern recognition. We see the mosaic of our lives our works. How all the elements fit. How they all stream about, and through each other.
My book...the first volume anyway is titled "Psalms of a Hungry Child".
Because I was, and am "Hungry". Not just for food, but for love life wonders, and the unnameable. As we all are. In going through my "stacks" the piles of written works I've done...the drawings too. I see the patterns.
All of those stories rants articles fantasies that have fallen out of my soul onto paper tells the tale of a very hungry child. It's all there in my words my codes. What I am, and aspire to be. Codes. Life. Multi-layered life codes. The DNA of My Soul. All of it waiting to be deciphered by the world.
To be continued.